I feel out of it.
Yesterday, someone called me for a survey. Even though I should have been cooking dinner (I made hot dogs with mashed potatoes and cheese on them, quesadillas, and broccoli, which is a really random dinner, but tasted really good at the time), I took the survey from the nice boy on the other end of the phone. He asked me all these political questions, and I mostly just gave vague, conflicting answers. Politically, I am mostly clueless. I mean, I don’t live in a cave, but I’m still quite out of it.
The Newbery awards were given, and I again felt out of it. I hadn’t heard about any of those books, and I really should have. I do claim to love young adult fantasy and children’s books. But I was out of it. I didn’t even know it was time to give the awards out.
I was sitting in class today, and I again felt out of it. So I’m majoring in English, but I do not at all feel like an English major. They are really good people and all, but I’m not one of them. I really tried hard to listen, and overall the class was interesting, but people seemed to be thinking on different wavelengths than I was.
Sometimes I have to look around and realize that I haven’t talked to half of my family for a while. I had to schedule an appointment with my dad so that we could get back in touch.
What have I been doing with my life? Where has my mind been?
Oh, that’s right. I keep on texting/emailing/talking on the phone/instant messaging this one particular person. Thinking about when I’m going to see him next. Etc. Ever since December, my brain became permanently removed from society because it is preoccupied with someone else.
I am out of it. But that’s okay.